Member-only story
There’s a special place in both hell and the newspaper for the sort of people who commit crimes that are simultaneously desperate, dumb and hilarious.
This is my favorite true crime story of the moment.
The Location: A Red Lobster in suburban Pennsylvania
The Crime: Assault. Sort of.
What would you do for one of those cheddar biscuits and a pile of shrimp? Less than two months into a global pandemic, a woman in East York, Pennsylvania decided some things were more important than health, basic decency, and the pursuit of middle grade seafood.
Mother’s Day 2020 wasn’t a great one for Red Lobster. With COVID-related staffing shortages, a takeout-and-delivery-only state policy, and a customer base that wasn’t yet accustomed to delays and shortages, a perfect storm brewed in the suburban strip mall. One thing was clear: the system wasn’t set up to support an apparently life-threatening need for lobster tails.
According to footage shot by a bystander, the unmasked woman (whom the internet quickly named Red Lobster Karen, of course) felt she’d had to wait too long for her food and started demanding her money back in a hail of curses, insults, and eventually, aggravated assault.
